The other day I was watching a favorite childhood show of mine, Married …..with Children, with Al Bundy (main character), who's a shoe salesman, a father and husband that was regretful of many of the decisions he made in life. Some of his decisions included not attending college and playing football; feeling like he married the wrong person; working below minimum wage as a shoe salesman, which was never a dream of his, and all around feeling stuck and unhappy in his life.
While this T.V. show made for good laughter, there are so many people in real life who feel stuck where they are and uncertain of how to begin the process of moving forward. Your life may not be as over-dramatically horrible as Al Bundy’s, but there are ways to begin a new chapter to make better decisions and choices for you!
So, today I’m kicking off my“Design A Life You Love” series, where I’ll share some tips, resources and inspiration, over the next two weeks to help you get into the mindset that you CAN live a life more aligned to what you love. Check out my first tip below
Address the Elephant in the Room
Have you ever had to make a major decision or needed to address a situation, but kept avoiding it? Or have you said yes to doing something when you really meant no and now you’re feeling the pressure of it. I know this feeling all too well and understand how it brings about anxiety with the thought of confronting someone or a situation that’s causingyou stress and problems in your life.
And while it may seem easier to act like this problem doesn’t exist, by avoiding and not facing the issues head on, leads to ongoing problems that continue to resurface or liefestering beneath the surface of your heart and mind. What stays buried within us tends to show itself in various ways such as defensiveness, depression or being quick to anger.
Dealing with the elephant in the room requires your ability to confront, your willingness to walk through a difficult patch and the patience to know it will get better.
Confrontation leads you closer to the truth
This is definitely not one of the most favorite things for some people to do, but in doing so it gets you closer to the truth, relieves pint up anger and stress; and releases the weight you've been carrying around in your spirit. With confronting, first check yourself. Take a moment to be truly honest with yourself about what’s going on.
At the end of the day, no one has to deal with your situation more than you, so telling yourself the truth is key. Once you’re clear about the situation and next steps, you can begin the process of setting yourself free and creating healthy boundaries going forward. With confronting others, approach the person with kindness and truth. You can bring about the best outcome by not focusing, so much, on continuously rehashing the past or current challenges, but looking at the solutions for where you desire to be.
Your willingness to walk through challenges leads to better outcomes
When challenges are brought to the forefront and everything is on the table, it’s tempting to want to go back to the way things were before. Sometimes we try to down play the problem, in order to make others and even ourselves not feel uncomfortable. But in doing so, you’re taking yourself back to the same hurt. Be willing to be still and go through the process of whatever rough patch comes, so you can become stronger on the other side. Be willing to do what you believe you can’t and acknowledge what you’ve avoided. Will this be easy? not at all, but your willingness to see the problem for what it truly is, will help in better dealing with the situation and not prolonging your time in it any further.
Patience is important after confronting challenges
After confronting the elephant in the room and dealing with the situation, it requires your patience with the process taking its natural course in moving forward. While you may want to hurry it up and “get on with it” there are opportunities for growth and lessons to take away from these situations. Be patient, and remain firm in your decision, do not waver to appease others, but know that with the truth in plain view the situation will work out. The ability to accept and tolerate the outcome is your lifeline during this process.
This is just one of the topics I’ll show you how to work through in my upcoming online group coaching program,
“She Designed a Life She Loves", which kicks offSunday, July 10th (click the link to learn more). While summer is a time to wind down, take this down time to join the online program and community so you can learn how to revive those areas of your life that's been buried under everyone elses wants, demands, and create strategies on building the amazing next chapter of your life. Click here to learn more and register today.
In the meanwhile, head over to where I virtually hang out and let’s connect.
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P.S. If you know anyone who would benefit from these tips on confronting challenges, then forward them this email. It’ll give them tools to build courage and face tough situations with grace!
Until next time